Does it Really Matter if “They” Understand?

Unfortunately we all have those family members and friends who just do not get Fibromyalgia (FMS).
​You can try to educate them.
You can get angry with them.
You can ignore them.
Before doing anything, however, take a moment to consider this:
When it is all said and done, does it really matter if they understand?

Whether it is because it is holiday time, a birthday celebration, or just a chance meeting, unfortunately we all have those family members and friends who just do not get Fibromyalgia (FMS). Even worse, most of the time they think they know more about it than you do. There are several ways to handle the situation.

You can try to educate them.
Not everyone is teachable, for whatever reason. Perhaps they are not capable of learning, do not want to understand, are just convinced, for some reason, they have gotten better information from another source even though it is wrong, etc. Sometimes the situation or location is not conducive to making it a teachable moment.

You can get angry with them.
Anger is a legitimate emotion and one we are all entitled to. There are times when enough-is-enough and it is time to let someone know it. There is a fine line however between assertively informing someone that they are out-of-line and aggressively addressing the issue, ending up out-of-line yourself.

You can ignore them.
Sometimes it is best for you, the other person, for others, or perhaps for everyone, to just be the bigger person and let it go.

The question is, “Does it really matter if they understand?”
I am not going to pretend for a moment that I know the answer to all the possible hypothetical scenarios. I am not even going to say I would know the correct answer if I knew the details of an actual situation. In fact, the only one who can answer that is you.

Only you know the dynamics of the relationships involved, the personalities of the people involved, etc. Only you know if you want to use your limited energy trying to set the record straight. Only you know if you will be helping more than hurting or hurting more than helping by taking a stand. I do know, however, that whatever the topic, rarely will everyone you know agree with you or understand your situation.
​
In my own LIFE, there have been situations when keeping the peace, preserving relationships, not spoiling a special occasion, or just being the bigger person or more understanding person was the best thing for everyone involved, including, and maybe even most especially, myself.