by Meshea Crysup, Founder fibroLIFE
LIVING a fibroLIFE Blog
I have always been introspective. Even as a very young child--three or four--I agonized over what I had “done” with my day, everyday. Uncharacteristically for a young child, I understood that, like money, I only had so much “time to spend”. I had this innate sense that LIFE was short. I just knew that LIVING my LIFE was not the same as existing. In truth, one of my earliest fears was that I would merely exist...
Heavy stuff for a child. Heavy stuff as a teen in a very dysfunctional situation. Heavy stuff for a new wife, new mother, divorcee, second-time wife, second-time divorcee... Heavy stuff, and ironic, for someone with Fibromyalgia (FMS). After all, it is notorious for stealing its victims lives. Not via death, but rather through the limitations imposed upon them by the pain, fatigue, mental fogginess, mood disorders, and a seemingly endless list of “other symptoms”.
I am not sure I believe in irony however--a post for another time, probably even another place. What I do believe however is that as surly as I need air to LIVE, I have to find ways to encourage others to LIVE. Regardless of having FMS, another chronic condition, sharing the LIFE of one who does, or all the other endless variables possible in LIFE, each of us only has so much LIFE to LIVE. We only have so much TIME to SPEND. It is not up to me how you spend it, nor am I trying to make it so. I just want to be sure you realize this truth and are keeping an account of how you are spending your limited time. I just want to be sure you are not merely existing, but rather, CHOOSING how to LIVE your LIFE!
Time...Life...both are short. Please, choose how you spend them!
Meshea Crysup, Founder fibroLIFE , LIVING a fibroLIFE Blog, Fibromyalgia Patient-expert
4/20/2017 09:47:26 am
Thank you for your article, Meshea. I never thought much about, "spending time." Certainly as a university student and then as an elementary school teacher there was never enough time to accomplish the many tasks on my overflowing to do list. it seemed I was always racing against the clock, trying to meet one deadline or another. Then as my fibromyalgia symptoms heightened, my goal was finding something, anything, that could lessen the horrid pain and host of accompanying symptoms that severely curtailed my activities. Simply surviving the day became a major goal. Unable to teach, barely able to move; my time was spent shuffling between my bed, infrared sauna, and hot tub. I prayed for a miracle, I even prayed for my own death; anything to stop the pain. So grateful to have found the beautiful wellness work that helped me to uncover and resolve the numerous unresolved issues and stressors that were making me so very ill. I cherish each moment of my remission and try to make every day count.
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